Baxter Bark Twice

Do as I say, never as I do

Posts Tagged ‘TGIT’

Good to Know Vol. III

Posted by AllieB on November 7, 2013

Oh hey. I don’t think there was a Good to Know Vol I or II, but I wanted to give myself a head start. Herewith: some pearls of wisdom, observant observations, and a corgi. And a Hilary.

1. Happy Birthday, HILARY. Have y’all met Allary? She is Allie + Hilary. This freaks me out in a big way.

Alhi

 I feel like my eyes are messed up. What is happening. DO NOT WANT!

2. Jason Isbell’s album Southeastern: buy it.

3. If you ever tire of lighting your money on fire or throwing twenties in the garbage, by all means spend some time among the items displayed in the Sephora check-out line. It will have the same affect.

4. There’s a reason southern women are so pretty and non-weathered: it’s because they aren’t ravaged by northeastern winters every year. Winter is way harsh on the epidermis, and I’m already on the offensive. First, Yu-Be Moisturizing Skin Cream. I’m a sucker for all-purpose moisturizers, especially ones made in other countries without the pesky FDA to approve them – this one comes from Japan. It’s not at all greasy and kind of reminds me of Carmex without being too Carmex-y. Good for hands, face, cuts, burns, etc etc etc. Second, Benefit Watt’s Up. Good bye ghoulish, ghostly winter pallor – helloooo glowing snow bunny! It’s a highlighter for your face. Use with blush/bronzer and you’ll glow like a worm.

collage makeup

Come at me, Motha Nature

5. I originally had my your/you’re grammar peeve for #5, but I’ve decided to let it go. Your welcome.

6. Kale. UGH I am so over kale. But even I know how dumb it would be to not eat it on principle (I have principles?!), and my preferred method of consumption is via chip. Kale chips are the bomb.edu. I don’t eat them because they are nutritious; I eat them because they are delicious. But heed me on this: said chips should only be consumed in the presence of someone whom you trust implicitly, someone you know will say, “yo, you’ve got something in your teeth” because, after this leafy snack, you will have a whole garden of kale in your chompers. What’s not in your teeth will be on your shirt – this can be hard to spot if you’re wearing a dark color, just FYI. Maybe no kale chips on a first date.

7. I was the only female in my subway car this morning. I counted 35 dudes, give or take, and then me. That’s weird, right?? I thought that was weird.

8. I cannot say enough wonderful things about the author Bill Bryson. I realize that his books, on on the outset, might not seem terribly exciting, but they ARE – he can make boring, random, pointless crap absolutely delightful. I just started his new book, One Summer: America, 1927 and not only have I already laughed outloud many times, I have also learned a lot. I love laughing and learning! Nerd.

9. Do you follow Humans of New York? DO it. Do it now: Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr, buy the book. It is my favorite thing on the internet.

10. The 33 Dumbest Things That Have Ever Happened is pretty entertaining. Upsetting, but entertaining.

Jack's best friend's emergency:

11. I’m only on 11?

12. THIS corgi. I just keep looking at him and smiling. So regal.

corgi

 Sprawled. Credit: FlemBot

13. Speaking of ole FlemBot, I wound up dressing up for Halloween after all.While I am not a particular fan of Grateful Dead, I felt okay dressing up as Sugar Magnolia because I know some of the words to the song. Plus, I love a floral domepiece. Halloween in NYC is a spectacle. I feel like everyday could be Halloween in this city, but on October 31 people achieve a whole new level of freak.

scarlett begonias sugar magnolia

Scarlet Begonias & Sugar Magnolia, y’all

14. Make this on Sunday and have it for lunch all week: Fall Orzo Salad with Butternut Squash, Bleu Cheese, and Pomegranate Seeds. The recipe doesn’t mention the pomegranate seeds, that’s BBT’s Top Secret Ingredient. And by BBT’s I mean Fresh & Co., the place where I purchased the salad yesterday. It was so delicious and it really does seem easy to make, so I goog’ed the recipe and that one’s pretty close. I don’t know what pepitas are – perhaps use pumpkin seeds instead.

Cooking tips are not really under my purview…I should probably leave the recipe talk to the 4,968,999 cooking blogs out there. Hey, look – I have a camera and I heated up some pre-made chocolate chip cookies! People should see this! And don’t EVEN get me started on the fashion let’s-take-a-picture-of-me-in-my-outfit sites…..I feel like, since I have a blog (www.baxterbarktwice.com), I have free rein to judge other people who have blogs. I gotta say, I’m pretty unimpressed. The Bill of Rights is great and I do love America, but there are a lot of people whose right to Freedom of Speech should absolutely be revoked.

15. I love a good cityscape, and NYC never lets me down.

nyc sunrise

Yesterday morning’s sunrise. Prob spent longer taking/enhancing/posting this pic than I did actually running. #priorities

16. Sixteen Candles, Sweet Sixteen, 16 Handles….ok yeah, I’m done.whiteflag

I hope you all have really great Thursdays. Me, I have a packed night of plans – a quick stop at the salon for some personal primping, an art show, dinner at Pylos with some gal pals…you know, just L-I-V-I-N’

Baxter, out

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Thoughts: Shallow & Deep

Posted by AllieB on September 12, 2013

I had an idea once that I might go to all of the classes Equinox offers then write about them, and, while that is a really good idea, it also requires me to go to all of the classes Equinox offers…so, sadly, this brainchild was over before it began. However, I do make it to the occasional group fitness gathering – last night was Asset Management. Not a seminar on finance, mind you, but an hour long workout focusing on your…assets. It was a good class, the teacher is Australian and Australians are funny, and there weren’t any ridiculous props like that VIPR class, (remember the giant tube I had to sling around?!? I wish I could forget) but there was a girl – a really not cute one – who had zero concept of personal space. This class was packed to the gills, and here’s Susie McLargeAndInCharge, barging into my very small area during each segment.

please stop

if this were my gym class, I’d be the woman wondering how/why/HOW I am in contact with the frontal protrusion of the man sitting in the row behind me  (how not shocking these are Tennessee fans)

I just get really mad when people don’t pay attention to their surroundings. It’s less the personal space invasion – I always invade Sister’s personal space every time I see her – and more the complete disregard for others. Susie Sausage was not picking up on my pointed looks and noises of frustration, so I finally stopped and stood still during a side-to-side exercise, and, whaddya know, she ran smack into me (it was all I could do to stay on my feet). She stopped short and looked at me first in surprise, then in anger, and I served it back tenfold; I glowered at her. Then and only then did she look around and realize just how out of bounds she was – I’m pretending like I heard her mutter “sorry” and not that word that rhymes with witch as she retreated to her area. You better believe she kept her distance for the duration of class. Once again, David hath defeated Goliath.

It’s a good thing I can switch up which location I go to, probably need to steer clear of that one for awhile…

And now for the news:

-FIRST and most importantly: 38 Essential Pizzas Across the United States. Readers from my most densely populated areas are decently covered, but it gets a little spotty around Missouri. Sucks for you, Mizzou.

-Fashion Week is still going on up here…me – I’m done. I’ve  had to totally re-tool my Instagram account, I’ve really had enough. I did see one disconcerting article that mentioned how Birkenstocks are back?Unfortunately, BBT has close contact with a bona fide Birkenstock Expert, so let’s check in with her – Hilary, thoughts?

-A related-yet-not-a-sequel-or-prequel to Harry Potter is in the works! And it’s legit – JK Rowling’s involved and everything. I love Harry Potter, and I – we – could all use more Hogwarts in our lives.

-watch the roasting of James Franco (it’s on YouTube, find it yourself). And if you can’t watch it all, at least watch Bill Hader – Bill Hader is #1

-I got 100+ likes on my last Instagram post (see below). I’m not gloating; it was a very special picture…which brings me to today’s Special Segment. I’m all for light ‘n breezy, but sometimes I like to get a little real.

light tribute and tower

For various reasons, the anniversary of 9/11 was more significant for me this year than any year previous. Obviously I feel an ever-increasing level of solidarity with the city, but I think a lot of it is just plain geography: living down in TriBeCa, where the new One World Trade Center tower is such a pervasively physical presence, I can easily visualize what used to be there even though I never really knew the view myself. I can imagine how the planes came in, and I know now where people sprinted up the street – my street, where I live – away from the buildings in sheer terror, knowing that something was terribly, irreversibly wrong but without any clue as to what had actually happened. Then I can hear the deafening silence as the dust settled and revealed the gaping hole where the towers once stood….although it’s still completely unfathomable, I guess I just have a better sense of it all, and I’m really grateful for that. I read upwards of 100 articles yesterday and watched countless videos, and, while devastating, the overriding sense of hope – even mere days after the attack – is just…it’s inspiring all over again. Jon Stewart, on his show’s first airing post-attack on 9/20/01, gave a very touching, candid monologue. See below (video/transcript):

I just wanted to tell you why I grieve–but why I don’t despair.

Any fool can blow something up. Any fool can destroy. But to see these guys, these firefighters and these policemen and people from all over the country, literally with buckets, rebuilding. . .that’s extraordinary. And that’s why we have already won. It’s democracy. They can’t shut that down. They live in chaos. And chaos, it can’t sustain itself–it never could. It’s too easy and it’s too unsatisfying.

The view from my apartment was the World Trade Center. . .now it’s gone. They attacked it. This symbol of American ingenuity and strength and labor and imagination and commerce and it’s gone. But you know what the view is now? The Statue of Liberty. . . the view from the south of Manhattan is the Statue of Liberty.

You can’t beat that.

Thank you for letting me share.

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Hide your crazy and start acting like a lady

Posted by AllieB on August 22, 2013

Oh hello.

Recently, thanks to the wisdom and maturity that comes with turning 30, I have been able to face some harsh realities about my person:

1. I can be lazy

2. I have a penchant for over-indulging

3. Time to put my money where my mouth is and start writing that damn book

4. I overthink everything – I am my own worst enemy

5. I need to give myself more credit

None of this is brand new information, obviously, and self-awareness is an important trait, but it’s pretty worthless unless I start modifying my behavior. So…that’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to be a go-getting, self-disciplined, published author who doesn’t dwell on the mundane and gives herself a pat on the back every day.

Too deep? I feel uncomf. Let’s head back to the shallow end and talk lobster rolls.

It’s not a total non sequitur: lobster rolls are something in which I  might very easily over-indulge if I didn’t enforce some self-discipline (see #2). I would eat one, like, every day if they weren’t $28/ea and didn’t have 8,000 calories. For this reason, and I have a similar rule for fettucini alfredo, I only get to have it once/year and it has to be worth it. IE, from the best restaurant and I don’t mess around with portions. This way I’m neither deprived, nor am I disgusting – you know what I say about moderation and how key it is. I don’t respond well to words like “no” and “don’t” and “can’t” and this system allows for indulgence but in a – what’s that? – yes, moderated way. Playing mind games with myself is exhausting, in case you were wondering. And this brings us to #4, doesn’t it…

lobsta roll

that’s some straight food porn right there

Enough with psycho-babble BS, BBT. Dinner at Pearl Oyster Bar, home to the best lobster roll in NYC, was so fun. Three cool girls, some rose, a heaping serving of lobster and mayo on buttered bread with shoestring fries and some fried oysters on the side… Laureo & EDon, we’ll do it again soon, but we’ll have to go somewhere else because my lobster roll quota for 2013 has now been fulfilled.

I am moving over Labor Day. The moving part blows, obviously, but the end result is very exciting. I’m headed downtown, y’all, and it’s going to be great. I’m on the river, I’ll have a balcony overlooking the river, there is an ice machine and a washer/dryer IN UNIT. Plus my rent is going down by like $300 – I feel as though I’ve struck real estate gold. I was running along the Hudson River Running Path the other evening, and I took this pic at the intersection of my new street + Westside Highway (my building is half a block behind me).

what a serene vista

what up JERSEY!

Speaking of running…I use Songza, an app whose virtues I’ve extolled on many occasions, for tunes. I first choose the day and time: it was Monday evening, then the activity: working out, then I choose the genre: the selection varies – I usually go with Aggressive Rap but I chose Upbeat Country. I forgot how enjoyable country is…anyway, Miranda Lambert’s Mama’s  Broken Heart came on, and one line really stuck with me…reference: today’s title. Ladies, hide your crazy.

BOOM – I never do what I say I’m going to do, and this week I did: dos posts en una semana.

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Truth Day

Posted by AllieB on August 15, 2013

And by truth day I mean…a day of truths.

1. I like Perrier, but I love Pellegrino

2. If there’s one thing I really miss about Atlanta it is the ubiquitous, well-priced, spacious delight of a grocery store that is Publix. It irks me that grocery stores up here can’t sell wine – I’m not sure what BS law mandates that; I think it’s just because there isn’t enough room. I also really miss the Publix sub sammies; this was a heretofore containable yearning that has blossomed into an insatiable craving thanks to this link MC sent me. The key, y’all, is to ask them to scoop the bread and add fresh jalapenos to everything.

If you’ve never experienced the glory of a Pub Sub, you’re probably wondering what’s soooooo great.

Publix Subs Are The Most Delicious Thing To Ever Happen On Earth

two points for the Leo GIF. You come here to me, Leo

3. When people try my patience I count to ten and employ breathing exercises I learned in that yoga class I took once. Namaste.

4. I saw this on Pinterest ages ago, and it’s really stuck with me. That Pinterest – so wise.

wise words

truth bomb.

5. I don’t drink coffee, I drink Earl Grey tea with almond milk. 3-4 cups in the morning, 1 in the afternoon. And now you know so you can quit wondering

6. My new running shoes are from the men’s department – NOT because of size…because of color.

7. Why is it that people with brand new puppies do not post nearly enough pictures, yet people with new babies…all the damn time.

8. I used to smoke a LOT of cigarettes. It was a filthy habit and one I 100% shut down literally the day I arrived in NYC.

9. I’m alarmingly bad at math. I didn’t know how to do 20% of a number until like six months ago. People always told me the trick of moving the decimal to the left and multiplying by two, but I thought it was it myth. It is not.

10. For the love of Roy G Biv, slow your roll on filters. I don’t not use them, but – as with everything in life – moderation is key. Taking innocuous scenery shots and using 12 CameraPlus filters is cheating, and then it usually goes from bad to worse with hashtag drivel like, #nottooshabbyforaMonday – it’s annoying as eff. Here, por ejemplo:

before and after

A totally meh scene made post-worthy by aggressive enhancement. #waitthatiscool #maybeIshouldputitonInsta

11. That empty subway car is empty for a reason

12. BBT turned three in July. This means to say: if BBT were a dog, BBT could get wasted legally. In toto, BBT has 341 published posts – 3/4 of them are about weather, 2/3 mention Kate Middleton, 1/2 discuss my love of reading, 1/3 tell that story about the woman dying next to me on an airplane…I’m lucky anyone reads this thing.

13. Once you’re in the trust tree, you’re there for.ev.er

14. I really like my job. Even without Bagel Fridays I genuinely look forward to coming to work. And, just when I thought things couldn’t get any better, my most favorite friend El works here now, too!!! I’m on the 10th floor and she’s on the 11th, which is good because there needn’t be too much togetherness, but it’s fun to know she’s here and is available for afternoon strolls and/or AWD’s.

2000 lax cats

We go waaay back: 2000 Lax Cats. We’re in there somewhere

15. Back to Leo, please enjoy this GIF history of Leo DiCaprio raising glasses. Will someone give the man an Oscar already!? I’m going to watch Blood Diamond this weekend. Maybe also Romeo + Juliet.

16. My kid’s gonna be the one with the pony. My kid might also be the one without shoes…

17. Allow me to reiterate my suggestion of Orange is the New Black. My enthusiasm has increased tenfold in the last week and you should all tune in. No flakiness – it has my official stamp of approval. Boom. Sidebar: did you know that I am a notary for the State of New York? It’s like I literally have a stamp of approval.

18. Y’all know how much I love horoscopes – NYMag now does a weekly roundup using, yep, GIFs (scroll down for the good stuff). Here is mine for this week:

GEMINI: Go off by yourself and spend time in contemplation or meditation. At this time of year, psychological self-evaluation can be of enormous help in your personal growth.

Ha. Haha. Well played.

19. This seems like a good stopping place.

And a very happy Thursday to you and yours!

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NEXT!

Posted by AllieB on June 27, 2013

It happened; it’s over.

sistas in the city; my bestest Juan embracing life on Top of the Standard; city biking on Westside Hwy (NO HELMETS DANGER); there's a cat on Sissy's head

Bday Weekend Breakdown: sistas in the city; my bestest Juan embracing life on Top of the Standard; city biking on Westside Hwy (NO HELMETS DANGER); there’s a cat on Sissy’s head

Moving on! In less than two weeks I depart for Africa. Every time I say “Africa” I automatically hear that song “Africa” in my head – it’s getting pretty old. One thing that’s cool about this trip, besides the fact that it’s going to be really cool, is that it will enable me to cross off 6 of the 7 continents from my list: Continents. This leaves only Antarctica, which is actually super convenient because all I need to do is nail down an SI Swimsuit Cover and I’m all set!

dang

made ya look

Back to Africa. Ok, one more look at Kate . . . and NOW back to Africa: I will take tons of photos, of course, and tell you all about it when I get back. One thing that should cause all of us some concern is that, from NY->ATL->Johannesburg->Malawi->Johannesburg->ATL->NY I will log in approximately 50 hours of flying time.  My god that is a lot of time to be on a plane within 12 days…it really hit me when I did the math just then…oh dear. Anyway, unpleasant things tend to happen to other people while I’m on board airplanes (e.g. death, broken pelvis, violent nausea), so this doesn’t bode well for my fellow passengers – that is a lot of time for others to be at risk. Best wishes for safe travels!

50 hours. What the crap am I going to do for 50 hours. Pre-Teen Allie is getting fidgety just thinking about it…

In other news, some of which is legitimately worthy:

-THE ODDS ARE IN MY FAVOR!! If Princess Kate has a girl (which everyone thinks she is) the odds are 5-2 that she will name her Alexandra. If I cannot be Princess Kate, I will settle for being the namesake of her first born. (Credit: Caro)

-the amazing story about the man who slipped into a coma upon consuming 413 cheddar cheese biscuits fat Red Lobster is, sadly, not true.

-The Heat with Sandra Bullock and Melissa McCarthy is getting really good reviews – I thought it looked dumb, but perhaps now I will see it on Sunday. I always listen to reviews, just as I always follow the rules regarding bicycle safety (unless that outlaw Sister is involved)

-This list of “Lessons Learned” is applicable to everyone, regardless of occupation/age/gender – it’s written by a Vice Chairman at the PE firm Blackstone. The guy’s been around for 80 years, he knows what’s up.

-is anyone interested in renting my sister’s townhouse in Jupiter, Florida? I can’t believe I’m even posting this, I’d really rather it stay in the family for when I am in the mood to visit SoFla. I am trying very hard to not think about what $1,860/month gets you there vs. what $1,860 gets you here…..gross.

Happy Birthday to AMERICA!!! I love the 4th of July. I’ll be heading east to the Hamptons, and I will enjoy the beach, fireworks, $30 cover charges at Talkhouse, and overcrowded accommodations. God bless the stars and bars, sahn.

food you can make look like an American Flag: lasagna, assortment of cheeses, Budweiser, dessert

food you can make look like an American Flag: lasagna, an assortment of cheeses, Budweiser, dessert

If you need the recipe for Budweiser, let me know.

TGIT! It is unclear to me how it is only Thursday, but I am ever so thankful that this, the longest week ever in the history of all the weeks, is almost over. Be well, make good choices, and, as always, do as I say but never as I do.

Posted in Arbitrary, Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , , , , | 9 Comments »