Baxter Bark Twice

Do as I say, never as I do

Posts Tagged ‘TV’

10 Things About Fall & Other Stuff

Posted by AllieB on October 9, 2014

It’s fall, y’all! Fall, according to the Goog, is the most popular of all the seasons, so here are 10 things about fall and other stuff, then I added two more items at the end so I guess 12 things total. I try to mix it up; BBT is NOT some basic fall-loving betch who only talks about new sweaters and pumpkin spice lattes.

1. This is me not talking about pumpkin spice lattes – never had one; I don’t care; you do you but maybe consider the sugar content

2. TV is not only back, but there are a lot of new shows to check out: How to Get Away with Murder premiered two weeks ago, and, besides its annoying name (HTGAWM henceforth), BBT highly recommends. Marry Me has such potential (Penny from Happy Endings! Ron from Party Down!) and, I’m embarrassed to say this, Selfie might not suck… Homeland wrapped up some very tired story lines (smell ya later Brody) and the season premiere shows much promise for good TV – just so long as Carrie never touches her child, or anyone else’s, ever again. Lastly, I watched the first episode of The Affair last night – I am IN. It caught my eye earlier this year when I heard about the cast (Pacey Witter! Maura Tierney! Jimmy McNulty from the Wire!) and, based on the first epi, it is everything I hoped it would be.

3. I got stung – stung bad – by a bee in Idaho last weekend. I hope it died.

sun valley

Idaho – who knew? (I know other people knew, but I didn’t) CONGRATS Nandi & Duncan!

4. 31 Dog Reactions for Everyday Situations – this is perfect, please click thru (#’s 1, 2, 9, 12, 14, 16 – 25, 31)

5. I’m not implying that all kids raised in NYC are brats, but I have observed a heightened level of the ridiculous when it comes to parenting up here. Case in point: I was recently at my local Whole Foods doing my daily shopping of only things I needed right that moment (nothing if not practical!), and I noticed a father and his two children, a boy and a girl both under age of 4, in the midst of truly epic meltdown. The girl, the younger of the two, had collapsed on the ground and was crying that especially aggressive silent cry where her mouth was open and her body was heaving but no sound was coming out. Not to be overlooked, the boy had wrapped himself around his father’s leg while he cried a more subdued whimper but with double the snot and tears. Dad, to his credit, wasn’t freaking out but I think this is likely because he’d checked out entirely to his mental happy place. “Woof” I thought, as I skirted by them to get in line, “I wonder how much longer he’s going to let this go on..” I also may have thought things like, “get your sh*t together little girl” and “can someone please wipe this kid’s nose”

Finally, something yanked Dad back to reality – maybe it was that his daughter hadn’t taken a proper breath in like a minute – and suddenly he was totally, 100% over it. His eyes darkened as he inhaled deeply….”PENELOPE! ALVIN! THAT. IS. IT! When we get home….NO soy dream for you.”

Aaaaand you lost me. Hey, buddy, FYI: the moment you named your kids Pompous and Arrogant you gave them license to behave like jerks. I want to give him the benefit of the doubt that one or both had some sort of dairy allergy, explaining why soy dream was the most glorious treat in which they’re allowed to indulge thus the absolute worst thing he could take away…but with names like that, it’s hard. My advice? Sign the girl up for soccer, the boy up for football, and cancel all lessons involving wind and string instruments. There’s still hope.

*Note: when I have kids one day and name them Philomena and Astrid and they go mental at the grocery store you can remind me of this post.

**Y’all know I’d never name my kids that.

***Confession: I played the Alto Sax in third grade. It was a risky move but I pulled it off. Penelope – not so much.

****I don’t know anyone named Penelope or Alvin, do I?

6. Jimmy Fallon + EW! = watch this.

7. My Father, The Hero (?)

Just kidding. Dude, that's too much...and when this pot calls you black, you better recognize

Dude, that’s too much…and when this pot calls you black, you better recognize

8. All the hilar Insta accounts you need to follow, give or take a couple – there’s really something for everyone. You should check out that blog regardless, @AshHess is doing good stuff over there. Thank you, Witty & Pretty!

9. Brush up on history with a healthy side of scandal and intrigue with After Camelot, a sweeping biography of the whole Kennedy family – there are lot of them, so it’s long, but you can breeze right through it.

10. This week in That Is Brand New Information: Todd Gurley is a Badass

Georgia running back Todd Gurley completes 50-yard pass (GIF)

I could watch these all day.

Here's the GIF of Georgia's Todd Gurley running like Marshawn Lynch against Clemson.  -- (Via @SBNation)

***UPDATE 10/10: I posted this yesterday before the TRAGIC news that TGII had been suspended. Why God. Why. I am 100% #teamtodd and still think he’s one of the good ones – he’ll get thru this and go on to have an amazing career and keep a clean record all the while, of that I am sure, and in the meantime us Georgia fans will have to hunker down and deal with the hard knocks that we should by now be used to/expect. TEAM TODD!!!

Bonus #11: I needed a crisp white button down to go with my outfit yesterday, but I couldn’t find the iron because we don’t own one, so I used my straightener instead – it totally worked! A tip from me to you: best to remove the shirt then iron as opposed to keeping on shirt whilst wielding a piping hot wand of heat near your skin.

Super Bonus #12: I think we already knew as much, but I asked Siri the other night who’s the fairest of them all, and…well:

fairest one of all

And there you are – a BBT for your Thursday. Boom.

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Hello, 911? I’m on fire

Posted by AllieB on May 30, 2013

I am well aware it was but a few weeks ago that I was ranting and raving about the endless NYC winters, but I really don’t care about how flaky and/or melodramatic I seem because I just don’t.  Today, after a Memorial Day weekend where the high topped out at 48 degrees Fahrenheit on Saturday, it is 92 degrees and the air feels like hot, stinky breath. I am seriously, legitimately concerned about how I am going to survive the next few months. I joked last week about getting bob haircut – as if! – but today I’m thinking a full-on Ellen DeGeneres whack job. I’m not kidding. And my hair is the least of my worries. Do they have full body deodorant? I’m talking Secret Prescription Strength for head-to-toe. The good news is that my office temp is a comfy 58 degrees, so I have to wear sweaters and scarves inside then basically disrobe to go outdoors. Winter’s easy:  you just put on more clothes. The wet, hot, American summer of NYC is a new animal with which I’ve yet to grapple, and I’m already thinking about ceding victory…for I am screwed. BOLO for 3 straight months of red-face/dancefloor Allie.

This week I present to you a very special segment: How to Stay Slim & Trim. I have two things that are really going to rock your world – perfect timing for ‘kini season!!

1. PRANCERCISE! What is prancercise, you ask? Prancercise is defined as follows: A springy, rhythmic way of moving forward, similar to a horse’s gait and is ideally induced by elation.” But why use words when there is video:

I had a hard time getting past that camel toe, but I powered thru and am already planning to go prancering after work. I’ll fit right in doing this around the Central Park Reservoir. Don’t need sound for that video, and you don’t need to watch more than 20 seconds. Thank you, Sista Wedge.

2. Aw, crap.

AB marathon

The gods have spoken. If I’m going to talk so big about running a marathon, it seems I might actually have to do it. I bailed on the LA race in March, and when I signed up for the NYC race on a whim I assumed there was no way my name would be chosen from the lottery – I worked it out: I had an 8% chance of getting it. Given my history of never getting chosen for anything, I felt pretty confident about my odds…until that email showed up earlier today. Just this morning, during my morning yog, I thought to myself, “I sure am glad I didn’t get chosen to run that marathon in November.” But it’s local, it’s important to participate in light of the Boston Marathon tragedy, and it’s something I always said I’d do. Plus I’ve got like, what, 5 months to train? Totes doable – I’ve already got my Body Glide and everything. I don’t think I can prance my way through this one, guys.

And now for the really, really random stuff:

-Ron Swanson is one of the greatest TV characters of all time – that is a statement of fact, not opinion. His awesomeness is elevated in this slideshow depicting his feasts throughout the 5 seasons of Parks and Recreation as well as his commentary.

-My birthday party is happening. I haven’t sent out the invite yet, but here’s a preview…!

bday invite

ATTN anyone tempted to refer to my upcoming birthday as “Dirty Thirty” – you are preemptively dead to me.

-Ya know how I went to the Stones Fest last Thursday to see my friend Parker play? Well…it was awesome. Jason Isbell, Norah Jones, Boz Scaggs, Regina Spektor also played… I will never, ever forget the ensemble performance of Shine a Light (my most very favorite song) as long as I live….read about it here – this guy knows a whole lot more about it than I do.

Remember that really funny spider email from 2008? I had totally forgotten about it until I rediscovered it last night. LOL

funny spider

I threw this together in like 15 minutes but I’m on a great streak here of not missing a week, and I gotta keep up the good work.

TGIT! Eat, drink, and be merry. I’ll see you next week – same time, same place – unless I melted, in which case…who knows.

Posted in Arbitrary | Tagged: , , , , | 13 Comments »

Eat, Watch, Ridicule…

Posted by AllieB on January 31, 2012

Get it? It’s like Eat, Pray, Love but not. What day is it – Tuesday? I hate Tuesdays. Nothing original has ever happened on BBT on a Tuesday – I find Thursdays are the best days for unique material – so I’ll just link to a bunch of stuff that other people have already said and/or done…including that of my own work.

First seen on BBT in May 2k11. Sorry I’m not sorry.

EAT (when it opens): ATLiens: chef/restauranteur extraordinaire Kevin Rathbun is opening a “small plates steak” place in ADAC in Peachtree Hills this summer: KR Steak Bar. I’m excited because I love steak and who doesn’t appreciate a good, old-fashioned rhyming name. Welcome to the neighborhood, KR.

WATCH: Kristen Bell is funny. She reminds me of MPvZB (a compliment) and MCL says she was great in Veronica Mars. She’s been on the circuit lately touting House of Lies, a new show on Showtime of which I am somewhat fond (it’s kind of ranchy?), but here she is on Ellen…and she’s having a sloth-related meltdown. I don’t quite get it, but I like what I’m seeing – she has very little shame. Obviously need sound:

credit: Y Kenna.

ALSO WATCH: Do you like musicals?!?! Tina, I know you do. Unless you live in a hole, you’ve probably seen the trailer for the show, Smash, that premiers next Monday Feb 6. Ever resourceful, I watched the first episode last week OnDemand, but it’s also available for free on iTunes. I liked it! I’m losing you, I can already tell, so that’s all I’ll say about it – but check it out.

TAKE THAT, KATHERINE HEIGL: according to this article, “experts” are saying her career is over. Good riddance, I say – I find her incredibly obnox, not to mention a very one-note talent. The best she’s ever made it on my list is “slightly less annoying than her most annoying” and that’s not very promising.

I hope your day isn’t suicidal. TTFN!

Posted in Arbitrary, Food & Drink | Tagged: , , , | 8 Comments »

The Year of the Dragon

Posted by AllieB on January 3, 2012

I’m jumping the gun on the Chinese Zodiac here, but it seemed like an aggressive, carpe diem sort of title which is only fitting for post numero uno of 2k12.

Happy New Year!!! It’s gonna be a good one – I can feel it in me bones. I aim to get a bit more personal with you peeps in the coming year, but that won’t be starting today. No, today I will pass along just a few points of interest, then you can carry on with your Tuesdays. Freaking Tuesdays.

If you are a Comcast subscriber, Showtime is offering FREE ACCESS this coming weekend. This is excellent news as Sunday, January 8, includes the season premiers of Shameless and Californication, and the series premier of House of Lies. I’ve been ranting and raving for months about how mandatory it is that you all have Showtime, and now you can just figure it out for yourself. But be sure you listen up for my voice in your head saying, “I told you so” accompanied by a knowing flat face when you’re on the phone with Comcast next Monday morning. If one more person comes up to me and says, “omigosh I am just LOVING that show Homeland!! Have you seen it??” …. I will pull a Nick Brady and punch them in the throat.

I’m no longer an avid AJC reader – I get my news from NYMag and the Today Show, which means I tend to know very little about local events, but I was at my parents’ house yesterday and stumbled upon award winning cartoonist Mike Luckovich’s favorite cartoons of 2011. He’s one of the AJC’s few claims to fame, and I really like his stuff. Check out the slide show here…and my favorite below.

RIP :(

Also sad: Georgia’s loss yesterday. Pretty irrelevant but football related: Oregon’s chrome helmets in yesterday’s Rose Bowl game were pretty rad. And that’s all I have to say about sports.

There’s no better day for hibachi than January 1, and I’d like to give a quick nod to Nakato on Cheshire Bridge: reasonable prices (particularly if you get in there for the Early Bird Special: 6:30 or before Sunday – Thursday), entertaining staff, and excellent pink sauce. And, I don’t know if you knew this or not, but Tower Liquor is now open on Sundays, and it’s right around the corner…

January kind of sucks because there’s a real emphasis on self-improvement and change and the righting of wrongs and other things of moderate to extreme difficulty. I guess it’s exciting in some senses – fresh start, clean slate, etc. – but mostly it just makes me tired. Or so it has in the past….this year is a totally different ballgame. BOLO for Active Allie, Backbone Baxter, and an All-Round-Better BBT. Like I said: it’s the Year of Dragon…I’ll be channeling Lisbeth Salander for the first few weeks, at least.

Welcome home, PALLISON!!! I feel whole once again.

From left: me & you :) Just kidding – here’s a much nicer/accurate rendition of us…

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Homeland Girl with a Sherlock; Extremely Loud & Shameless House of Lies

Posted by AllieB on December 12, 2011

There are LOT of things to look forward to in the coming weeks in the tv/cinema arena. In case you aren’t subscribed to five weekly tabloids (People, Us Weekly, Life & Style, InTouch, Entertainment Weekly – Friday is a veritable partay at BBT’s house (at least it is when my neighbors don’t steal my shiz)), here are some especially noteworthy things coming up. Listed not only chronologically, but in the order as shown in my oh-so-cleverly spliced title:

The season finale of Homeland – Sunday, December 18: Ok, if you’re not watching this program you’re doing yourself – and maybe even our country – a grave disservice. Each week’s episode has trumped the last, and last night’s was no exception. NYMag does a pretty great weekly re-cap of each episode, which I highly recommend reading. Claire Danes is, hands-down, the ugliest crier on the planet, but instead of ruining everything like she did in Romeo + Juliet with Leo di Caprio back in 1996, her disfigured emotion adds a certain level of necessary mania to her character. Finally, a niche market for that contorted face.

Girl with a Dragon Tattoo – Wednesday, December 21: Oh.My.God. I AM SO EXCITED. Even if there is a slight change to the story line, as there allegedly is about 3/4 of the way through, I am confident I will love this film. I heart Daniel Craig.

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows – Sunday, December 25, 2011: Robert Downey, Jr. is awesome as Sherlock. I’ve seen the one that came out in 2k9 several times, and I still enjoy it. While RDJr totally steals the show, his rapport with Holmes (Jude Law) is very natural and plausible – they have great banter. Also, the way they film the action/fight scenes is really cool in this slo-mo kind of way…”really cool” “great” “awesome” – I’ve missed my calling as a movie critic, haven’t I?

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close – Sunday, December 25, 2011: This is going to be a real tear-jerker. With the cast (Tom Hanks, Sandra Bullock), director (Stephen Daldry – The Reader) and subject matter (9/11), it’s getting all kinds of Oscar-buzz. I’ll see it because I love to cry audibly at movies in theaters whilst sitting next to strangers, embarrassing my friends who have to depart the theater with me. Hello, The Help, Marley & Me, Titanic.

Shameless – Sunday, January 8, 2012: This is yet another gem on Showtime. Season 2 is coming in hot with it being summer time in Chicago- ie, no school and even more time for these Gallagher kids (and father) to run amok. The story lines are, at times, somewhat off-putting (that whole deal with Karen going crazy and seducing Frank made me very uncomf), but I am a huge fan.

House of Lies – Sunday, January 8, 2012: A brand new series to premier after Shameless on Showtime. Have you subscribed to Showtime yet? If you aren’t picking up the phone/initiating an online chat with your Comcast representative by the time you finish reading this post, you’re a fool. It stars Don Cheadle and Kristen Bell (in a surprisingly racy looking role…!) who work at some top-tier consulting firm. Suffice it to say, R-rated shenanigans ensue. It looks like quality stuff.

So… there you have it. De nada. That actually took me kind of awhile to write – like 30 minutes, at least.

And now, for this week’s Funny Christmas Foto Gallery:

Agreed.

FYI.

I took it too far, didn’t I?

Tis the season for December Bender. Have a merry Munday!

Posted in Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , , , | 5 Comments »