Baxter Bark Twice

Do as I say, never as I do

Posts Tagged ‘FYI’

A Change of Address

Posted by AllieB on June 28, 2012

Gather round, y’all – BBT’s got news: I’ve decided to move to New York. True story – come Labor Day, bye bye ATL and helloooo Big Apple. I’ve got lodging sorted out (at least temporarily – and it’s not here), so now all I need to focus on is that pesky job thing. This is where you come in – put your ear to the ground and let’s find me employment in NYC. Okgreatthanks.

Don’t worry, I’m not going to be all mopey or anything…at least not right away, and the reason I’m announcing it now is that I know people residing in NYC read this, and I also know that the world wide web is an excellent networking tool, so I’m making use of my assets. I am, however, going to compile a bucket list of things to do before I no longer declare ATL as my current city on Facebook – here’s what I’ve got so far:

  • Climb Stone Mountain. Haven’t done this since I was like 6 and I want to do it again. So far I’ve recruited Fleming, as long as it’s not hot…so I might need back-up.
  • Clermont Lounge. Come 1 AM don’t let me come up with some lame excuse as to why I can’t go – take me kicking and screaming. I’m 90% sure I haven’t been before – sacrelig, I know.
  • Dine in the Sun Dial Restaurant. Possible I’ve never done this either…which also seems wrong.
  • Go to Decatur – maybe even take MARTA to Decatur? K and A have done this…and if they’ve done it, any excuse I conjure up is irrelevant (not because y’all don’t do stuff, but I think we all know where you (and most Atlantans) stand on MARTA)

Et cetera. Hopefully I will be a better city citizen in NYC than I am here. Besides my knowledge of back roads and dive bars, I’m apparently not so Atlanta-savvy…

So that’s exciting!!! BBT goes to the Big Apple. Who knows what will happen….Sloane, let’s be besties and maybe I can right your coattails to literary success??

I just tried to segue off into a new subject about my massive crush on Olympic swimmer Ryan Lochte, but that’s going to have to wait – putting my news on BBT just made it very real…and now I’m even more excited, so I’ll keep it short and sweet. I do want to apologize to those whom I should have told personally. I owe you better, and I’m sorry, but this all came about pretty quickly, and I wanted to give you plenty of time to plan my going away party get my name out there re: employment…

Lady Liberty and I have already been in touch – it’s good to know the right people. (Credit: who else. Hilary.)

Posted in Arbitrary | Tagged: , , , , , | 12 Comments »

A day late and a dollar short

Posted by AllieB on January 24, 2012

It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood, no?

Well, I totally dropped the ball on this one: the “First Place Passion” – a tour of first homes which is part of the annual Cathedral Antiques Show – happened on Sunday, January 22. I think I thought I had more than one opportunity to check it out…I really need to start reading beyond the headlines. My nearest and dearest Nancy and Ryan Duffey’s home was featured, as well as Clary Bosbyshell’s and Nicky and Jack Arnold’s. Per the account of the always reliable and ever so tasteful Carol Harrell, the houses looked awesome. Neat, I’m sure they did. Nancy, I’ll come over for some wine this week and you can take me on my own personal tour…in a non-weird way, of course.

Good news: you can still see the Inspiration House – here’s that info:

Premier - Saturday, January 28
Tours Sunday, January 29 | Thursday, February 2 – Sunday, February 5
Thursday, February 9 – Sunday, February 12

The Inspiration House, located on the grounds of The Cathedral of St. Philip, is for anyone who has a passion for design that elevates the day-to-day living experience. Twenty up-and-coming designers showcase their creative talent in a home that can inspire ideas for the modern family. The Inspiration House is included in the Tour of Homes.
Donation: $10 at the door without Tour of Homes or Antiques Show tickets.

More info here. Nancy Duffey and Allison Harper are two of the twenty designers showcased in the House – they did the nursery. IN FACT, check out this article I just stumbled upon – way to go, you two! So talented and famous.

AND you can still attend this event, which is not your grandmother’s antiques show but an actually fun and lively partay, hosted by some seriously serious heavy hitters (purchase tickets here):

I am cranky. First of all, I realized last night that I have no plans to leave the country this year, and I’m really bummed. I know – first world problems and all that – but this is just bleak…this time last year I was preparing to go to Pakistan. That was a great trip. NOT that I’m saying I wish I was returning to Pakistan – I’m pretty sure such a jaunt would be strongly ill-advised by the CIA travel website - but I wish I was going somewhere…Secondly, I woke up this morning to the breaking news that Starbucks is going to start serving beer and wine. Oh, really, 11Alive? Breaking news? I beg to differ. May I direct you to this entry from October 19 2010, which is one of the least read posts in BBT’s history – there are zero comments. This isn’t the first time I’ve scooped the local news.*

G-force and I at the Badashi Mosque in Lahore. I will likely share more pics in the coming weeks as I reminisce – I know you are all waiting with breath that is baited for a shot of me in my salwar kameez. Good times.

*Upon further research, I learned that Atlanta is one of two locations nationwide that was chosen to launch the beer and wine, the other being Southern California. I guess that is kind of newsworthy. I will acquiesce on this point, but I still say I scooped the news.

APU^, writing BBT has cured me of any and all crankiness and I’m back to breezy :)

^Hilary, that means “as per usual”

Posted in Arbitrary, Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , , , | 4 Comments »

I’m in a glass case of emotion: the story of BBT

Posted by AllieB on December 8, 2011

Today’s inspiration: the word “inspiration.”

My Idol Person I Like a Normal Amount: Sloane Crosley. Sloane is why Baxter Bark Twice is even extant; she is who I wish to be. I hope she doesn’t have a Google alert set up for her name and reads this. Actually, I hope she does. Hi, Sloane. Sloane has written two books: I Was Told There’d be Cake and How Did You Get This Number? Both are compilations of personal essays ranging in subject matter from bridesmaid woes to international travel to failed relationships and hot-off-the-truck furniture. She is really funny and frank and sometimes it seems like she takes the thoughts from my head, aligns them in an articulate and coherent manner, and writes them down. Pallison had the good fortune to run into Sloane on Sunday at a Barney’s Co-op in NYC. She co-opted (wordplay!) her in the dressing room, and absolutely spewed word vomit about how she and her friend Allie were her biggest fans, how we’re both friends with her on Facebook (true story), and how that line out of How Did You Get This Number, “it wasn’t as real as you thought it was” changed both of our lives. (Read the book. You’ll see what we mean.) Sloane, ever graceful, handled the situation with aplomb. Anyway, in an ideal world, BBT’s posts will parlay into longer, more personal essays, multiply several times in number, and become compilations that will be published. Fingers crossed!

Sorry for saying “spewed word vomit” with regard to your actions, Pal. I probably could have opted for a different choice of words – I didn’t, but I could have.

Person Whose Closet I Want:

Olivia Palermo. Gah.

The Movie From Which “Baxter Bark Twice” Originated: Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy. Baxter is the name of Ron’s dog, and, after Baxter is drop-kicked over a bridge (see below), he goes missing. Later in the movie, Ron receives a call from someone who he obviously assumes is his lost dog, and says, “Hello? Who’s there? Hello? Who is this? Baxter… is that you? Baxter! Bark twice if you’re in Milwaukee…” See? My last name is Baxter, so it makes sense. Team Newnan can take credit for this moniker.

Weeeeeeeee!

So, that’s how that happened. I always assume that everyone knows why Baxter Bark Twice is called Baxter Bark Twice, but I suppose if you’ve never seen a movie or if you hate to laugh, you could very well have no idea. Glad I was able to clear things up. If you’re looking to kill some time, I highly recommend visiting IMDB and reading quotes from the movie. I could do this all day.

Veronica Corningstone: I will have you know that I have more talent and more intelligence in my little finger than you do in your entire body, sir.
Ron Burgundy: You are a smelly pirate hooker.
Veronica Corningstone: You look like a blueberry.
Ron Burgundy: Why don’t you go back to your home on Whore Island?
Veronica Corningstone: Well, you have bad hair.

Ok, the end. Have a very thirsty Thursday!

Posted in Arbitrary | Tagged: , , , , | 9 Comments »

A BBT Exclusive: Survey of the Sexes

Posted by AllieB on January 27, 2011

Inspired by literary masterpieces such as Cosmopolitan and Maxim, I decided to do a short survey asking guys and girls what they like about each other in a very physical, on-the-surface sense. I’ve done the leg-work, I did the research, and now I have the answers…ish.

Without further ado…

  • Of the 19 males who participated, 68% are in a serious relationship, 32% are not
  • Of the 35 females, 66% are in a serious relationship, 34% are not
  • Ok, now for the good stuff

Q & A with the dudes:

Personally, I’m very pleased with the outcome of ass vs boob…to the second, I’m a bit surprised with Athletic Gear. I’d have thought that Corporate Attire would’ve been second, or perhaps Costume…shows what I know!

Lastly, here are some excerpts from the open ended statement, “I love it when my significant other/crush….”

- looks and acts particularly hot

- makes me laugh

- laughs

- answers the phone

- does something spontaneous

- Cooks gourmet meals

- Laughs

- strips

- Does pretty much anything totally unexpected.

- gets drunk and dances

- makes breakfast for me, cleans my house, does my laundry, is extremely rich, dresses up like richard simmons in bed

- doesn’t wear cardigans

If your answer is missing, that’s because it was outrageously inappropriate and I thank you very little for sharing such crassness with me. As for the ones I could include, my favorite is “doesn’t wear cardigans” because that is so random, and regarding “answers the phone” – it concerns me that this is what you love most about your significant other or crush…it doesn’t sound like things are going so well…

Q & A with the ladies:

I just realized I forgot to take my own survey. Dunce. Anyway – so, now you know: we don’t care much about your wardrobe, bank account, or abdominal region, but, unlike you, we don’t so much prefer the workout look. That’s likely because if a boy is in athletic gear, it means he probably smells like feet. Also, girls look better in spandex than guys do.

I gave girls the chance to answer the open-ended statement, “My favorite thing about my significant other/crush….” I was going to do excerpts, but they’re either redundant or ALSO much too inappropriate to share on BBT (turns out I have some pervy friends), so instead I will paraphrase what 35 females said is their favorite thing about their boo/wannabe boo and include a few noteworthy quotes:

  • he makes me laugh
  • he is considerate of me and values our relationship
  • he loves me in spite of how crazy I am
  • he is hot
  • he works really hard
  • I can embarrass myself in front of him
  • when he cooks for me
  • “his newfound love for reading”
  • “his bed-head”
  • “when he wears his glasses”

The End. I think my favorite part of this thing was reading the write-in responses, except the ones that were gross. People are weird, and some of you need to wash your mouths out with soap. I suppose that, overall, the results aren’t earth-shattering, but this wasn’t exactly the Spanish Inquisition…

Is it 5 yet? AWD’s…who’s with me??

Posted in Arbitrary, Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , , , , | 16 Comments »

There are stupid questions

Posted by AllieB on December 2, 2010

This doesn’t make me sound super cool, but I have an unquenchable thirst for knowledge. I like to know things, and if I don’t know something about which I am curious I like to research until I can figure it out. Google is my favorite invention, ever. I say that quite literally – I thought about it, and of all the things I make use of on a day to day basis I appreciate Google most. I’m clearly not counting cars and food and wine, etc. I especially adore Google Image – the results to the query “puppies hugging” make me really happy.

MASH!

I get that looking stuff up online can be tedious and often it’s just easier to send a quick chat or email to a friend asking a quick Q, but there are limits. To those who send gchats asking, “how late is Trader Joe’s open?” or, “where is the concert tonight?” or, “what is a salad spinner?” – allow me.

First, I go to www.lmgtfy.com and am presented with the following screen, at which point I type in whatever idiotic question with which I’ve been burdened:

Per the instructions, I click a button – Google Search. The site generates a link, which I then share with the half-wit who has asked me about the salad spinner, whereupon they are firmly put in their place and probably feel like a dunce.

The link: http://lmgtfy.com/?q=what+is+a+salad+spinner

It’s hard not to feel foolish watching the process unfold – the first time it happened to me I think I actually blushed. You sit there, helpless, as the mouse scans over the screen, clicks in the search box and types out the question, then sends you to the actual Google results with a shame-inducing, “was that so hard?”

People don’t always laugh upon receiving this link, but it serves its purpose. Sister suggested that I become a comedienne, and I do not think she was being sincere. Lacy got so sick of it that she actually started looking things up herself. Me, I find it enormously entertaining.

Now, what should I goog…?

Posted in Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , , , , | 2 Comments »