Baxter Bark Twice

Do as I say, never as I do

Posts Tagged ‘punny stuff’

Here are your plans for Saturday night

Posted by AllieB on March 31, 2011

Do you like laughing? Yes. Well, if you live in/around Atlanta and you’re looking to mix it up this Saturday, I suggest you go see one of our nearest and dearest, one Mr. Matt Pyles, make his comedic debut in the  “Improv A**Hole!” show at the Village Theatre Saturday, April 2 at 8:30 p.m.

Here’s what you can expect. I was sold from the start, but they locked it down with “college drinking game.”

The show is our full fledged, home-grown Improv tournament – exercise your inner critic by voting on your favorite actors as they battle the crowd, the bottle, and each other (with torturous consequences)! Think college drinking game, mixed with a live-made-up-on-the-spot comedy show.

Buy tickets here or pay $10 cash at the door. BE ADVISED the show could very easily sell out, in which case you’d be S.O.L…in something of a pickle…etc.

Commtion/Spring Tour - 2009

In addition to improv comedy, Matt also plays in a little band you may have heard of –

it’s called Commotion.

GO BRAVES! Tomahawk Chop.

Posted in Arbitrary | Tagged: , , | 2 Comments »


Posted by AllieB on November 16, 2010

Boobs Legsly got the cover!? How infuriating. I suppose she’s earned it, though – if by “best dressed” they mean “breast dressed.”


Posted in Celebs | Tagged: , , , | 2 Comments »


Posted by AllieB on October 18, 2010

I find Russell Brand to be completely hilarious. It’s his delivery, his off-the-wall sentiments expressed in a matter-of-fact manner, to the point where, as the listener/reader, you’re prepared to find the utter nonsense streaming from his mouth completely legitimate and normal.

Case in point (excerpts from Vulture):

  • Per an audience member’s question, he doesn’t have plans to collaborate with Tim Burton, but he’d like to. “We’d get on. We could talk about hair and Gothic fairy tales, England, whimsy, and tortured adolescence.”
  • When he met the Queen of England, he was somehow with James Blunt, “whose voice is indiscernible in my mind from a clown’s horn” and who was once also a member of the Royal Guard. “That’s not fair! They’ve got all sorts of things to talk about. Like, ‘Oh, do you remember when you used to guard me? Thanks.’ What am I going to say? ‘Oh, I’m Shagger of the Year.’ She’s smiling rather generously, but part of me knows that that is just the remaining smile from James Blunt and it’s about to crumble into a deep frown.”

Maybe it’s just me…I don’t know, I think he’s hysterical.  I also think this video of Alphonso Smith of the Detroit Lions doing the Carlton Dance is funny. It’s hardly brand new information, but it’s Monday morning, so I don’t much care if I’m on the cutting edge or not.

Last and most certainly least, Ken Paves and Jessica Simpson are splitsville. Perhaps it’s been this relationship that’s perpetuated her fugliness, and now she’s on to bigger (no pun intended) and better…! I’m definitely interested to hear her new holiday album – I like pop stars’s holiday albums the best. Read: Mariah Carey.

Oh wait, one more thing: that is ENOUGH, Taylor Momsen. I wonder if one day, many years from now, she’ll be considering a family of her own and then remember, “goshdarnit, I hope those pictures of me dressing like a gothic prostitute with a penchant for violence aren’t still floating around…”

Posted in Arbitrary, Celebs | Tagged: , , , | 1 Comment »


Posted by AllieB on September 1, 2010

I’m not saying this is a road I’d ever want to travel down, but Boobs Legsly’s plastic surgeon is a true artiste.

This looks a little pervy, but whatevs – gotta give credit where credit’s due.

Posted in Celebs, Really? | Tagged: , , , | 4 Comments »

Just sayin’

Posted by AllieB on August 27, 2010

Here’s some good Friday reading material: Hungover Owls – because they definitely feel worse than you do.

“You uh…you need me to move my car?”

“You uh…you need me to move my car?”

The captions are a tad aggressive – even I, condoner of the occasional apropos curse word, feel it’s a bit too mas – but it’s also pretty hilarious and not necessarily inaccurate. Owls: wise and funny. Who knew?

Sidebar: I wonder when restaurants will realize that a sandwich called “The BLAT” is a sandwich no one wants to order. It’s very delicious – bacon, lettuce, avocado, and tomato – but that “A” takes a tasty BLT and makes it sound like a bodily function, or something else equally unappetizing.

“And I will have The BLAT, please.”

“Ohhhh, a BLAT sounds super delish!”

“Wanna split a BLAT?”

Thanks, but no thanks. Although I might get one from Souper Jenny for lunch – when it’s my turn I’ll just point to it instead of saying “I’d like a BLAT.”  I’m very good at gesticulating, and I really do love bacon.

Bacon slip-ons by Keds. I wonder if they come in a 10?

Posted in Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , | 6 Comments »