Baxter Bark Twice

Do as I say, never as I do

Archive for January, 2011

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Ruminations Part Deux: Help.

Posted by AllieB on January 12, 2011

I’ve just woken up from my afternoon nap (today it was more like an early evening nap), and I feel very well-rested. Having slept for 12 hours each of the last 24, I feel really very clear headed and wise. A tad sluggish, but getting back on the BBT horse earlier helped a bit – these posts don’t write themselves, you know.

Right before my nap, I was on Facebook, hitting refresh on my mini-feed and waiting for some sort of exciting information to pop up. It didn’t. Then, I saw it – on the bottom right hand corner of my page…Facebook Chat. It’s omnipresent with its grey dot, but I obviously never, EVER sign on the thing. I strayed towards it on my mouse pad, weighing the pros and cons as I got closer and closer….

ALLIE – NO!

Luckily, I was able to stop myself in time. I marched straight over to the carpet and knocked out a few sit-ups, punishing myself for such a near-miss. Facebook Chat?!? Never will I ever. Then I took Max outside and we both nearly bit ass on the sheet of ice that is the driveway. The shock of cold air did us both some good, and we came in revitalized and refreshed – in other words, in perfect shape for a nap.

Another lesson in poor judgement that I almost executed earlier was the purchase of some Pajama Jeans. I was watching some riveting daytime television when the ten minute infomercial came on…intrigued, I moseyed over to the website to do some more research – I mean, what a great idea: the comfort of some pj pants combined with the style and fit of my fave pair of designer jeans! And, what’s this: a free grey crewneck T that I get to keep even if I return my Pajama Jeans?! Sold. There’s no way these are too good to be true.

ALLIE – NO!

I think we can all agree these bad boys – genius as the premise is and as reasonable a price – are indeed too good to be true. Great for loungewear, maybe, but not so much in public. There’s one woman riding a bike in hers on the informercial – I guess they could be okay for that, too, and maaaaybe for a Sunday trip to the grocer…but probably leave them at home on your next dinner date.

So, a couple of close calls today…fingers crossed I venture out tomorrow. In fact, hopefully upon reading this those with mobile mobiles will be so concerned about my sanity they will come to get me, ignoring my insistence that they not put themselves at risk. Plenty of people have offered to fetch me, I would like to note, but it didn’t seem worth it….rest assured, I’ll be singing a different tune tomorrow.

Posted in Arbitrary, Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , , | 2 Comments »

Ruminations from a Recluse

Posted by AllieB on January 12, 2011

Five things that are true about yours truly:

  1. I do not prefer icy weather
  2. I can sleep a LOT
  3. I’m pretty creative in the kitchen
  4. I’m a really good dancer
  5. Not so much with the singing

I laughed at all those people stocking up on bottled water and such at the grocery store Saturday and Sunday. Look who’s laughing now – it’s certainly not me. Anyway, I’ve had a lot of time to do nothing in the last couple of days, and allow me to share with you my new knowledge.

To those of you with Showtime, you MUST MUST MUST watch the new show, Shameless, which premiered on Sunday night. By the end of it, my jaw was literally hanging open in shock and awe – in a good way. It’s about a highly dysfunctional family in Chicago – five kids, an alcoholic father, and their convoluted lives which are instantly engaging and fascinating. It stars William H. Macy, Emmy Rossum (of whom I have not fond memories from the scariest movie of all time, Poseidon, which is about rogue waves in the North Atlantic that are basically tsunamis in the middle of the ocean), and, my favorite, Steve Howey, who was Van on Reba. The show is racy, it’s smart, its moral compass is all over the map…in essence, it’s quality TV.

With an interesting selection of food in pantry/fridge, I’ve had to get a little creative. Last night I made a simple yet delicious (and not the least bit healthy) meal of pasta with eggs for dinner. It sounds kind of redundant, but it was really, really good. The recipe describes it as the ultimate comfort food, and I’m inclined to agree. I can’t quite explain it – it doesn’t just taste like pasta with eggs, somehow the flavors merge and it is a happy time for your taste buds and tumster.

Avril and Britney both have new singles out. Avril’s What the Hell is a guilty pleasure that gets shrill after awhile; Britney’s Hold It Against Me is an electronic number that sounds like it’s already been re-mixed for da club. However, I’ve had a few dance parties to both tunes, and they each provide more than adequate beats for that.

Meet & Greet: Max. I’m staying with Max at his house this week while his parents are in Cabo. CABO. He and I feel the same way about icy weather. We’ve been challenging each other to sleep-a-thons, and it’s unclear as of yet who’s the winner…we’ve both logged in some serious zzzz’s.

Oh, really HOTlanta? Really?

Posted in Arbitrary | Tagged: , , , , , | 7 Comments »

This is what I learned today

Posted by AllieB on January 6, 2011

Through various WordPress features I can see what phrases/words people search on Google or Bing or Yahoo or wherever that land them on Baxter Bark Twice. For those of you concerned about your privacy (K…), I can assure you that nothing beyond your search terms are divulged:

As you can see in the screen shot above, at some point in the last 17 hours some weirdo out in cyberspace entered the phrase “taco bell beef gun” into his search engine of choice and wound up at www.baxterbarktwice.com.

To the person who is looking for a taco bell beef gun: have fun being curious. However, if it helps, here’s the sour cream gun – maybe it’s not dissimilar to the beef gun…? Also, might I suggest going to the TB franchise on Northside Parkway near W. Paces Ferry – I’m sure the friendly folk there would be happy to help you find your beef gun.

credit: MPvZB

“…but you can imagine how wicked awesome the meat hose must be.”

I find it perturbing that BBT showed up in the search results for such a query. Perturbing…and kind of awesome.

Posted in Really? | Tagged: , , | 4 Comments »

The Man Repeller

Posted by AllieB on January 5, 2011

Meet & Greet: The Man Repeller – a new blog JBax (aka Baxter Bark Thrice) has introduced me to.

Boys have a different taste in girls clothing than girls do. I got curious about the preferences of the males in my immediate social circle so I polled a few friends, inquiring as to what things they find appealing and what things are not so much. Be advised, these responses will shock you to your very core…

Likes: mini-skirts, mini-skirts with boots, any kind of jeans “that fit good,” fur, sequins, tight capri work-out pants, when hair is pulled up and reveals the neck, and, to paraphrase, “anything that shows as much skin as possible.”

Dislikes: enormous sunglasses, too much perfume and/or makeup, anything by Lily Pulitzer, fur, sequins, obviously unnatural hair color, visible panty lines

Unanimous response, more or less: we don’t really care what girls wear as long as it doesn’t look bad.

Well, there you have  it – thank you very much to the gentlemen who humored me; your opinion is greatly valued here at BBT. To the ladies: better take note if you’re lookin for a boo.

Anyway, this blog is pretty funny.

MAN·RE·PELL·ER [MAHN-REE-PELLER]

–noun

outfitting oneself in a sartorially offensive way that will result in repelling members of the opposite sex. Such garments include but are not limited to harem pants, boyfriend jeans, overalls (see: human repelling), shoulder pads, full length jumpsuits, jewelry that resembles violent weaponry and clogs.

Girl 1: What are you wearing tonight?

Girl 2: My sweet lime green drop crotch utility pants

Girl 1: Oh, so we’re man repelling tonight?

The two photos and commentary below are an excerpt from her recent post, Trend Spotting: Red Lips, Man Repeller or Propeller? I really like this girl:

from Who is Bobb-Paris

I applaud her effort at trying to include a small bit of sex appeal via lace bralette, but the chambray shirt and high-waisted pajama pantaloons make this an immediate Man Getter fail. Good for you, Fupa Fran.

from Who is Bobb-Paris

Perhaps another effort at exuding a small bit of sex appeal? I see London, I see France, I see your granny-underpants. Sorry, Charlie. There’s a dead animal around your neck.

Upon further perusal, I’m realizing it’s not just about what repels men and what doesn’t – at least not singularly – she’s clearly v fashion forward and has some good ideas about recreating couture when you can’t afford it, item wishlists, etc…she’s also been featured as a guest blogger on ShopBop, Urban Outfitters, Lucky Magazine – the list goes on. Point is, she is a revered fashion commentator, but her approach is witty and interesting and more appealing to the masses.

Ms. Man Repeller is evidently something of a blogging genius.

Posted in Imparting Wisdom | Tagged: , , , | 5 Comments »

NYR 2k11 OMG LYLAS BOLO

Posted by AllieB on January 4, 2011

New Years Ressies for 2011…well, first I’d like to say that I’ve never been big on NYR’s because I do not respond well to self-inflicted restraints. Now, if I could get my head around the fact that these are not restraints, but goals, and they are not self-inflicted, but set with my best interest in mind, then perhaps I might have more success adhering to them.

Bottom line is: whenever I try to encourage myself to do something, my other self likes to rebel and prove that I don’t give a tiny rat’s a**. This is just silly because the only person being affected here is yours truly. Plus, it makes me sound like I have a multiple personality disorder, and that can’t be good.

So, here goes – my non-resolution resolutions for this year:

  1. Run a half, perhaps even full, marathon
  2. Cook for myself more. Nothing complicated – we’re not all Rachel Ray (THANK GOD), but how difficult can chicken w some veggies be…or even a tasty casserole…I have a few foodie blogs I can peruse for inspiration: Closet Cooking (I find Kevin just utterly charming), and Smitten Kitchen (I find her decidedly less charming but very wise) to name a few…
  3. Keep myself busy – be it a writing course at Emory, some sort of volunteer work, Dance Wii (it’s a date, Pantalones!) I want to keep myself/brain constantly active. Basically, I would like to have a schedule full of post/non work activities that do not necessarily include AWD’s. I’ve been told by both peers and people with letters after their name pertaining to a medical profession that I think way too much – but not in a good way. I figure – keep myself busy and I won’t have time to hem and haw over stuff that really doesn’t matter.

There might be a few more, but I’m not quite ready to divulge my heart of hearts on the WWW, so those I have shared only with a select few.

I have MISSED BBT!!! I had work-mandated time off from Christmas Eve – Jan 3 (as in, the office was closed, not that they asked me to leave…), and I totally checked out. I’m excited for the upcoming year – I hope to establish a more specific premise and perhaps even get this thing off the ground. I’m wondering if my largest category should be something besides “Arbitrary.” Hmm. Food for thought. Something to ponder. Chew on that. Etc.

Missy & Me on Christmas Eve; not my best look, I am realizing

Perhaps I will write exclusively about Missy Baxter…she at least deserves her own category.

**Afterthought: I would also like to add Do more yoga to that list. Or – actually do yoga at all, period, as I haven’t done it since that one time back in 2k9. I think it would be really good for me…on account of my rage.

Posted in Arbitrary | Tagged: , , , | 4 Comments »

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